What a 6.5 sounds like
I want to describe a time when I helped my neighbour. She is an old woman who lives alone in the flat below us, and she is about seventy-five years old.
One day in winter I was coming back from university and I saw her at the entrance of the building with two heavy shopping bags. She was standing there and she could not carry them up the stairs because our lift was broken at that time. I asked her if she needed help and she said yes, so I carried the bags up to her flat on the second floor.
She was very grateful and she invited me for tea, but I could not stay because I had an exam the next day. I felt very good after that because it was a small thing for me but it was important for her. I think helping others is a good habit and we should do it more often.
Why it scores what it scores: Correctly structured, easy to follow, and it takes the plan's advice to keep the act small. Two things cap it. The narrative language is plain past simple throughout with almost no variation in how time is handled, and the final paragraph slides into moralising — helping others is a good habit — which adds no new language and is the least interesting sentence in the answer.